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February 2, 2009

Thinking is Giving Me a Headache

Pass the Tylenol. Pass the Xanax if you have one to spare. I'll pay you back. Promise.

Once again I'm on the merry-go-round. Should I go back to work? Should I not?

I used to once upon a time work at a nursing home. I loved it there. Loved my co-workers or at least some of them loved most of the residents.

The problem is with loving who you work with or work for is that they do eventually go away. To Heaven. I really got a little tired of losing friends that way.

After one of my best 104-year-old nursing home friends decided that it was high time to clock out and go on a permanent vacation I thought maybe I should get a job elsewhere. Like in a hospital where the patients don't call their room "home." Where they would get better and walk out the door. The hospital was a good place to work, if only because patients DID get better and left the hospital in a more or less vertical position. Hospital politics? Meh. Let's just say five hospital presidents in the five years I worked there.

We started a business while I was working at the hospital. Initially the business was meant to be a little project but it kind of took off and turned into a real live j.o.b.

I was working two full-time jobs. Work/home became work/work at home/work/work/work.

The best thing about working at home? You don't have to get up and get dressed and get in the car.

The worst thing about working at home? You don't get to get dressed and get in the car and go to work and come home. Work is there right outside the bedroom door.

Then Hospital Politics reared its ugly head and all of the LPNs were let go.

"Fine" I said. "Business is good" I said. "I'll just work one freakin job and sit in my jammies all day not worry about juggling work/home/work/home/workhome.

fast forward a year....

Can you say r-e-c-e-s-s-i-o-n? Business is OK. Kinda. But I'm anal about the bills. Kinda.

The nursing home I worked at just opened up two new buildings.

I loved it there.

I should go and apply for a j.o.b.

What if they say NO?

What if they say yes?

Please come kick me off this fence I'm riding. My butt is getting sore.


Anonymous said...

You should think about your future. Will working at an agency be in the best interest of your future--401k, personal savings, etc..

If you are making an equal amount of money with your at home business then going back to work should be something you should question. But since your self-employed, you most likely do not have health insurance, etc, which would be beneficial for obvious reasons.

I think you should at least apply for a position and see what happnens. You can always turn it down if you don't need it.

jill jill bo bill said...

Totally agree with anon up there. Apply, tell them what you want hourly, how many hours you want to work and do what makes you happy and keeps your electricity on.

life in red shoes said...

My Mother called a nursing home "home" for over 10 years, people that like working there are a rare breed. If you like it, and you're good at it...do it. The people that worked there and treated her well were angels. If you are one of those angels, please, spread your wings.

Rudee said...

Caregiver fatigue is a real entity. I think as a nurse, it can be hard to set boundaries, but sometimes it's necessary. I shut my work phone off at the end of my shift and weekends. I don't turn it on until 45 minutes before my shift starts (on call hospice). In this way, I save my sanity-otherwise, people are bound to drive me crazy with calls. I can't tell you what to do, but if you think you'd like to work outside the home a bit, go ahead. How about part time instead of full?

Tiffany said...

I was a waitress years ago, at a retirement home (for rich people and they weren't allowed to tip. AH!) and it was really sad when someone would die. They usually had their own "spot" where they would sit and it would just be lonely when they were gone.

But oh how fun it was when we had an open bar on fridays. LOL

Queen-Size funny bone said...

I worked in a nursing home for 23 years and had to get out. I guess I burnt out. I love and still miss it but when I hear from others it has changed a lot. You can never go back but you can go forward. It might be different but it would give you an outlet and extra cash. JUMP...

Stew said...

I think you should apply! You really were one of those angels. It would be nice to have a steady paycheck coming in and maybe even some health insurance! Go for it!

J'Ollie Primitives said...

Thanks for all the encouragement, ladies.

Tiffany ~ lol at the "open bar!" We'd go to the bar and toast whoever had died. Is that the same thing? :)
Queen ~ thanks for the JUMP!
Stew ~ best little sister ever! I am overjoyed, you COMMENTED!! YAY STEW!

Snooty Primadona said...

I say go for it! What's the worst that could happen anyway? When I was on the steering committee to start a Hospice here (many years ago) each committee member would *adopt* several nursing home patients whose families didn't visit them. It almost killed me when the first one passed away. I also saw some horrible caregivers in the nursing homes with an occasional nurse angel. Good, kind nurses are so hard to come by.

♥ Boomer ♥ said...

I think we do what we have to do to get through this recession.

If you decide to go back, you'll grit your teeth and go for it. Your world will focus on making lives of those older people better than they would have been without you, if you go back there.

Personally, I love singing, etc., in nursing homes with my church ~ but I would have to buck up if I worked there full time because of all the goodbyes I'd be saying. But if you can make life a little brighter for those old folks, go back! Feel good about your decision. And who knows? Maybe you can invent 'pajama day' like they do during Red Ribbon Week!?

Debbie said...

I'd say apply as well. It would be comforting to have something steady at this time. It isn't forever:)

Debz said...

If the financial need is strong, or you are truly worried that the bills will become overwhelming in the next 6 months to a year, then I say go back to work. If not and you think things will be ok - then ride out the storm. It'll be worth it in the long run.

Unknown said...

Go for it! If you have a passion for caring for others, then you will continue to long for something more.

What do you have to lose if you just give it a try?

binks said...

It seems like it was a good fit for you.
Can you work there part time?

Kori said...

since I am uber conservative about money,manily because I HAVE none, I would say that if you can get a part-time job at one of the care centers, go for it. Just enough hours to make a difference financially, not enough to get totally strung out. But thta's just me.